What a menagerie

Holy Cow! The living room is a living example of a cacophony. The oldest girl is plunking out the theme to Beethoven’s Ninth, while the youngest girl is practicing how to make a sound on the piano with every finger at the same time. The youngest of all (one minute younger than his sister) is quiet only because the Polar Express movie is playing so he can watch, “My train! My Train!” The next oldest girl is explaining how the brand new chicks are following the mother hen around like, well, a hen and chicks. The boy that figures everything out too quickly is sure the new rabbit cage is stupid (explained at the top of both his lungs and his speaking range.” The kit is getting used to its cage. Hope it likes noise. By the way for those that don’t know a kit is what a baby rabbit is called. Anyway, we have no idea whether it is a doe or buck yet.

The only thing I know about the little darling is it is the newest member of the household. It was a close contest. The chicks arrived yesterday too. They were incubated at school as a lesson for students, and now they are returned to us alive and, for now, well.

My God, let’s take a census here – ten kids (children not goats) four cats, three inside dogs, two outside dogs, a potbelly pig, a Juliana pig (ugly as hell, but if we hadn’t taken him, the asshole that had him before would have abused him even more). Oh yeah, back to the roll call. Two roosters, two hens, six chicks (I just found out there are more to come today) and finally one lop-eared kit.

I did forget one animal, well three actually, if you include my wife and myself. I forgot the unicorn. She’s not really a unicorn. She is a white pony that my youngest, who loves the mythical animals, calls her ‘corn. She has the one live one. She must think of it as disabled because the horn is missing. Then there are three more stuffed inside. That’s stuffed animal toys. I don’t want anyone to think I’m a monster who goes around stuffing mythical beasts. One of her ‘corns is a rocking ‘corn. Then there is a smaller version about as big as a basketball, and then finally, there is the ‘corn that has to be slept with, otherwise, every bit of the seven layers of Dante’s hell envelops the house. The shrieking alone is loud enough that the corpse of Beethoven probably hears it while he’s trying to rest in his peaceful deafness.

And people wonder why I call this house the looney bin.

Personally, I’m waiting for the day the youngest two are house trained – wait – potty trained. I have spent the last fourteen years buying diapers and/or pull-ups, or cleaning cloth diapers. Do you know at one time we had six, that’s half a dozen, six children in diapers at the same time. That was one full kitchen trash can or rubbish bin of poop catchers a day. Whew, am I glad that’s over. Well, it’s almost over. Two more to go.

I was just informed that we will have more chicks coming home to roost today sometime. No idea how many.

Say, you might want to look up Lisa Towles’s blog. She interviewed me this week and here is the link. https://digitalraconteur.wordpress.com/2018/04/27/author-spotlight-jw-bell/

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