Like Eating Grass

I thought everyone with kids knew what the word nummy meant. I was wrong. During my time working in a self-contained special-needs schoolroom, I learned how wrong I’d been. More than one of the kids there had no idea what it meant, and if they didn’t know, how the living hell could they teach their parents?

The word is a derivation of Yummy. I trust everyone is familiar with that term. Nummy , a cuter, more child-like way of saying it and adding a smidge of fun. My kids know exactly what the word means, and it is a normal part of their vocabulary.

This is the season for tasty food, and this recipe is very nummy. It is a favorite of the whole family. I originally planned on writing a recipe for my potato soup. It’s hearty, warm or cold, and very filling. But this past week we Americans had our feasting holiday and along with all of the traditional items, I fixed this. My Father-in-law, who happens to be younger than me, (isn’t that a mind twister) but age doesn’t mean anything much. We’ve both been around for a few decades. Anyway, My father-in-law calls it grass and weenies. kind of catchy. So, here is the recipe for my nummy Grass and Weenies.

GRASS AND WEENIES (Kielbasa and Cabbage)
This recipe is half of my normal recipe. I cut it in half because most people don’t have twelve mouths to feed. This is plenty for six.

  • YOU WILL NEED:
  • 1-large head of green cabbage (about the size of a toddler’s head)
  • 1-can of Rotel (I use original) For those of you who are not familiar with this. It is a product that has diced tomatoes, onions, and jalapenos. If you cannot find such an item, I invite you to experiment with these.
  • 4-cloves fresh garlic
  • 1/2-of a sweet onion 1-large
  • pkg of kielbasa (one large package contains 3 lengths of sausages)
  • 6-strips of hickory smoked bacon
  • Puckett’s all-purpose seasoning (Any seasoning you are fond of will do)
  • Tony Chachere’s saltless seasoning (Any cajun seasoning will do. I use saltless because my doctor prefers that I do.)

Now to business. To do this the exact way that I do, you will need several kids, each with their Nummy,brand of adorability, charm, and godawful persistence that distracts and annoys. If you have all these things in place, please be careful. You will want to protect all of your digits, your face, and your respective things that jiggle. (You decide what parts I’m talking about on that last thing there.)

  1. Clean, strip, and dice the 1/2 onion. Place in a large stock pot, or at least a 4-quart Dutch oven.
  2. Dice and crush four cloves of garlic. Place in pot with onion.
  3. Fry the bacon until crispy and set aside. Save the bacon grease. This step can be done ahead of time if you care to. Use a small bit of bacon grease to sauté the onion and garlic.
  4. Clean and Chop cabbage in half, cutting through the cabbage heart and then again to quarter the head. Slice the heart free from all four portions. Next slice each quarter cabbage three times lengthwise, and holding the three parts together slice 1/2” to 1” portions until the cabbage is completely chopped. If you have your own way of chopping cabbage feel free. I added all that because I worked with a couple of old-school cooks who would get pissed occasionally and say, “Don’t try to teach me how to cut the cabbage!” Anyway, put the chopped cabbage in the pot with the sautéed veggies. Stir everything. (Double, double, toil and trouble; fire burn and cauldron bubble … Shakespeare’s — Macbeth. I couldn’t help myself. I love the Bard.)
  5. Open and pour in the Rotel (juice included). Stir again.
  6. Pour in all but a little bacon grease.  Cover and let everything stew and simmer on medium heat. Cover the pot.
  7. Cut all the kielbasa on a bias. In the pan you crisped the bacon, fry the kielbasa. Liberally season it with the Puckett’s seasoning while it fries. Keep it sizzling until most of the sausage appears burned. It cannot be a cinder, but you want it to look like the char on a grilled hot dog or brat looks just before the skin breaks and you take it off the grill. If that direction makes no sense, make it at least one shade darker than you think it should be. At that stage dump it into the pot with everything else. Keep going until all of the kielbasas are done. It is very important to cook the sausage darker than you ordinarily would. It enhances the flavor.
  8. While the pot simmers you need to stir it occasionally and make sure you do not let it burn. Once most of the cabbage has wilted turn it down to a simmer.
  9. Chop and dice the bacon until you have bacon chunks and set them aside.
  10. Once the desired texture of the cabbage is reached, go ahead and serve with your fresh bacon chunks sprinkled over the top. Do not worry about leftovers. I find the extra time it sits in the fridge adds well to the scrumptiousness of the overall dish. It is very filling so be careful. You might overeat.

While you are enjoying this nummy food it is time for an update on my book. Rebel E Publisher closed their doors and The Sigma Factor is not available online anymore. It will take a few weeks before I can publish it myself. However, I have a limited amount of hard copies of the book and will be glad to sell you one. Leave me a comment and I will get back to you.

Also, I will have a new book out soon. It is full of thrills, suspence, and son-of-a-bitch, what the hell was that’s! Set in Hawaii, Louisiana, and Wyoming, it has a cast of gun totein’ characters that are at once full of purpose and mystery, and dead set on finding out who is trying to kill them. Somebody ends up dead, others get meaner.

The Great Zero Sum is almost ready for Beta reading. Beta readers have a chance to not only read my book for free, but they have a chance to lend input too. I have a few who succumbed to the allure to be even better well read and agreed to help me, but I can still use a few more. Please let me know if you are interested. It’s a spanking good (did I say spanking?) It’s a marvelous story of which I am proud.